Friday, February 19, 2021

SO LONG.....


......and GOOD BYE!!!
 It's time for the Mistress to go into annual hibernation and close the Casa   just so I can have a little bit of a rest and escape the world and internet. I plan to visit Mother also if the weather permits. Her youngest sister, 62, passed this week in FA of  COVID. Tracers think again from contaminated items coming in the home, as she only went out for groceries and take out.  She had told my mother per phone many times...you'd never know there was a pandemic going on in Florida.I firmly believe states like this will help to never gets this virus behinds us.  But yes , Ill be back.... yes I will!  I'll pop around and post and read occasionally. Otherwise if you stop in...just keep the noise down huh? The houseboys are bad influences.

See ya ..sooner or later
XOXO

Thursday, February 18, 2021

FINALLY.....

 ....its here! ....my biography hits the big screens in May!!!!!!!!

And if you don't think my drive like her....ask some of my friends.

Wednesday, February 17, 2021

CATEGORY IS....

 .....beachy, Coppertone Realness

Denali Foxx

PS..She warned us she had a nice ass.

SPILLED TEA- BOSSY BITCH

I don't know what is going on this season? Am I missing something? Of all the episodes to date this season, I thought this was the worst one yet. It was sort of a brisk, no frills, rush through...a bunch of queens getting down to an acting improv...which went down quicker then the Titanic on the fateful night. It reminded me of bring rushed through a hook up at the No-Tell Motel because we had the room for two hours...and then the sex wasn't even that good to boot!  With exception to Olivia Lux, it  was painful to watch. What the hell was the panel looking at? And was TS Madison the best judge? Especially when it comes to acting?  I googled her... and let's say, it can't be hard to act bad in a trans porn, but she sank it to new levels of bad!!!! I saw things I can never un-see. But she was judging non the less. But anywhore, back to these queens.  

I think I'm starting to turn on this season. I don't know what it is. Maybe I shouldn't be watching the UK right along with this season, where the drag friendships and the camp, banter and shade flow more freely and natural on the UK showing. However...I will grant you that this episode starts on a high note, with having the library cards ready, because the library was open hunny. I'm happy to report that this reading challenge was solid, thought no one would call this the greatest edition, but they did step up to the breast plates. All except poor Elliott.

Helen Keller could have done a better read.

This weeks main challenge found the queens acting out improvise scenes in assigned teams for the Bossy Rossy Ruboot.
It was a Maury Povich meets Dr Phil type show with Ross Matthews in the titular role. This time around because of COVID measures, there was no studio audience, so the queens perform to a completely empty house. Having said that, I found Denali, Olivia and Rose' the best to watch, but the rest.... I thought were excruciating to sit through. I was having more fun pulling my toe nails off. Utica was a mess. She'd be perfect for a John Waters film. Girlfriend needs to bring in the weird in every challenge and runway with her mannerism and needs to stop. I can't help but wonder, is she not taking her meds? Her character made no sense.


On the main stage for the runaway, the category was beads. My top picks would have been Denali, Rose' as Tinkerbell... and Utica...which I'm sure the runways are saving her at this point.  I think, Rose should have been the winner of this episode. Olivia's was cute, but with the hair and beads and her look It reminded me to much of Kandy's runway from the bag challenge. I was ok with Olivia's winning the episode.
It's getting almost hilarious how Rose' and Denali just keep getting waved through, even though they did pretty good the last two challenges and runaways. Both of them served pretty much perfect high end and creative looks this week. I think the toll on Denali is getting to her, and will take her out. I 'll be surprised if she makes it two more episodes.

Kandy did a complete opposite this week and kept mostly quiet since she got knocked down a few pegs, either that, or her handlers finally fed her.... I feel she got overpraised for her look, I didn't see it. For weeks they told her no more skin and intimate apparel, and yet we got this? Now, don't get upset with me  Kandy... you hang in there girl and hold your chin up. Both of them.

Symone's look was an absolute stunner and really represented her well...and Ill give a pass this time on skin.

Tina Buner's look. I say burn it. I'm glad she did bigger hair, but with that wig she could have played Lassie.

I didn't dislike Gottmiks look by any means. Who doesn't like anal beads? But it was nothing we haven't seen already. I mean when Latrice Royale did it, my jaw dropped and I do think she did it better.
Which is my point. Being on season 13 in the US haven't we seen it all presented by now? So what are they basing wins off to bring something different?  

And so it came down to Lala and Elliott. And lets face it Elliott dodged a major bullet, but when she did that split I was all like...
It was great to see a queen do something...yawn...besides doing yet another death drop. I'm all for death drops...but not every song calls for one. It's done to death. No pun intended. With Elliott's look, the song and her chorography, I knew she had it. But Lala did the better lip synch. It was time for Lala to go. I just wasn't into her looks much for a show of this caliber. She always looked as it she walked into Forever 21, tripped over a sale rack and said Ill take it. Except for the time she went to Hallmark and came out with bags. But lets not get to comfortable with Elliott...I think her expiration is coming next. I hope she 's packed!  I enjoyed her, and I'd hang out her with her. She's has grown on me like a skin rash.

I do think Rose' is going to start warming up and showing up now that she is getting better praise. I'm also hoping the Snatch Game won't disappoint. If Gottmik does who I think she might...she may well win the game. Hitting the half way point of the show.... I am thinking the top five will be Gottmik, Symone, Rose' Olivia and think Kandy...because Utica doesn't seem to want to change up her  theatrics on the runway. But Tina will either close out the bottom half, or take Kandy's place in top five if Kandy fucks up. Either way, this season seems odd and more odd in terms of the judges decisions and favorites. 

In other news I now hear a International All Stars is in the works. 
Now that could be intresting. And now just for Bob......

Tuesday, February 16, 2021

FASTNACHTS!


That's Fastnachts Day not fast nuts!  

It's yet another day I can get behind! It's also big business in Pennsylvania. The Pennsylvania Dutch celebrate Shrove Tuesday, today,  by eating  potato doughnuts which are lovingly called fastnachts...and shouldn't be confused with store bought doughnuts or those of Dunkin. A true traditional fastnacht has no hole in the center, is potato based, and is a very light, pillowy, fluffy, often rectangular shaped, dough ball. The name fastnacht is German for "fast night". It is a day to forget about dieting and a slim waistline and feast on these things. The day began as a German tradition. Traditionally, the fastnachts are made to use up the lard, sugar, butter, eggs, and other rich foods in the house pantry before the austere diet of Lenten. It was thought if one filled up on these treats, you'd wouldn't be hungry as much while fasting.

Since Pennsylvania Dutch families were quite large, when the haus frau began to fry the raised fastnachts to use up the rich ingredients before Lent in her warm kitchen, the tantalizing smell of these raised cakes lingered in the farmhouse. As you'd suspect, the wiser members of the family were awoken by the smell, and realized that if they got up early, they could share in mothers treats. But the lazier ones may have continued sleeping, while the other siblings enjoyed the treat with a beverage. The last person up on Shrove Tuesday was called the "fastnacht"  and was often kidded all day along for being late for this wonderful breakfast.

Its one day that still and always will have, I suspect, fond memories for me of my grandmother. When I was a wee one and she baby sat me, I can remember her getting me up at the crack of dawn, where I went off with her to her ever faith church with about 20 other church ladies. They'd be there in house dresses, hats and aprons. They would makes hundreds of fastnachts and sell them in bags of four, plain and some powdered. The line would often be out the door from the congregation hall. Of course, every little old lady took pity, and when the others weren't looking, they would give me one. Needless to say after 8 I would feel sick. But I can still see and hear the church on those days. And the smell. But my grandmother I think knew I was snuck some, because once back at her house, I never ate any. To this day it's a wonder I'm not a porker.

This year with COVID I don't think any churches are having Shrove Tuesday sales...but traditional neighborhood bakeries should, if they have any sense.  I called C'est la Vie, the French bakery in New Hope last week, and put an order in. Yesterday, and Shrove Tuesday is the only time they make these. I picked them up yesterday, after walking dogs, they were piping hot too. The owner also put that sign out up at the top of the post so people know some background on fastnacht day. I got a dozen, and will give 6 to my lumbersexual neighbor. These are mine....


Check me out later this week on TLC for my episode on My 600lb Life.

Monday, February 15, 2021

MEANWHILE TONIGHT .....

 .....At the Casa du Borghese...

We may have had to much gin and Ferrero Rocher. 

I only like the good stuff

Sunday, February 14, 2021

MOOD BOARD

 

So yes.....this is happening. We're still in the mood for the day of love. I hope everyone had a good one, and did the advice of the harlet, Pam Demic pay off?

Flower Makers by Samuel Melton

LOVING...IN THE PAM DEMIC

Well, just in time for Valentine's!!!!

 

A day of love or sex , or both, not to mention the gorging of candy and other sweets treats. This year finds many with some major restrictions on a normal day of festivities if you celebrate the day.Stay at home orders (is anyone even following them anymore?), social distancing and masking it, is a universal conflict for couple and singles, and has made a new conundrum on what to do and how to do it. But no worries dears, my newest pamphlet,  How To Celebrate, Debauch, and Enjoy the Hot Loving of Valentines During the Pandemic, is HERE!!!! Pam,  since early years always loved Valentine as a young Demic...well,  at least till I got caught trying to shove my junk into one of those class made valentine boxes for little Mikey. I was trying to give him what he wanted!!! 

One good thing to do is creating a Bubble of Love! My personal favorite! How about some sexy lingerie and underwear and set the scene for a steamy evening...nothing like recreating a sexy version of Petticoat Junction...you can even work in chains and ropes! Then a rousing game of Enchanted Evening, a game about your goals and each others sexual desires. Followed by a luxury bath where you both pretend to be loofahs and clean each other off. And then dust off  the 4" of dust off the sexual guide book and try some new things and positions. I recommend  my own pamphlet, "Sizzling Sex for Life to Bring Out Your Inner Slut and Leave You Exhausted."


How about gifting  lovely matching bracelets and masks to each other that says Congrats! You have been vaccinated!

Break out those water colors and oil paints!!!!! Since we can't go out for a lovely paint class, why not put a twist on it?  Nothing more fun and erotic than body painting! Just think of the masterpieces.

If your more a cook, why not prepare a nice meal for your loved one? After all, nothing says lovin' like something from the oven!!!! And make sure why your cooking it, and SERVING IT,.. in nothing but an apron!


And don't get me started on the games. Fuck Old Maid and Scrabble. What does this look like? The old folks home at Mar- A-Lago?  Liven things up with a nice and naughty Truth or Dare Game. Or send your loved one on a scavenger hunt in the house. One note gives directions to the next note and so on. Each note at the location can give directions to the next location, but not before something dirty happens with instructions on the same note. If your real good, you'll forget your even on a scavenger hunt!!!!

And I'm here to tell you, if your single there is nothing wrong with spicing up those zoom and skype calls with some nice strip tease and a peep booth show, all my personal favorites to do. Just make sure there are no wires to trip on, and if on a wheely chair, I suggest locking the wheels first to not cause an accident,  bringing the backdrop down behind you. Not that THAT EVER happened to moi.

And it's Valentines Day...nothing makes a man more happy then getting oral. So pull up those rubber gloves and tell your man "I love to wrap both my hands around it and swallow. I was talking about giving him a glass of wine, and wine tasting... what did you think I meant?

How about a naked night? This is one of our favorites here and can easily be done. But if you have fluence a lot, that may kill the mood.

And if there is two things Pam adores it's food and sex. Who said gravy and dessert are to be only served at the dinner table? Bring out the ice cream, the whipped cream, the hot fudge, or why not eat some lunch meat off your partner? It just may be the best meal you ever had. I don't advise a roasted beef though.

Now I can't divulge all my ideas but your getting the drift. And if your in lock down with someone, for gods sake, don't take it for granted!!! Are you just sitting there staring at them???? If you want then to know there is steak for dinner, you got to let then HEAR it SIZZLE honey!!!!!!

And if none of that helps, I guess one can always fuck themselves! Now Pam is off to have a video call or two with some suitors,  so I must run and get beautified and changed ....and how ever you spend the day, just make you sure leave the rolling pin behind...and HAPPY VERNAL DISEASE Day! Oh, I meant HAPPY VALETINE'S DAY!!!! But the same tips apply.
Now I must run and refresh this drink, before my online showing.
This post has made me a tad hot children's.

Saturday, February 13, 2021

FROM THE CANDY SHOP

Since it's Valentines, you just knew it would be a matter of time before the Mistress brought back in some of my favorite confection to the Candy Shop...South American.


Diego Narvaez Rincon is a well known actor and model from Bogota Colombia.  And we know just how addictive and melt in your hands hot they are to handle!!! Diego is hot. He's handsome, and he as got an amazing body, great smile and those chesticles.... with just enough hair as to not look like a fucking bear rug. Who has time to pick hair out of their teeth? As one can see, he also has that mischievous look, nice and tight in all the right places, and doesn't seem to shy in showing off those said bulges and rips and depressions. I don't know what his work out routine is, but I can tell you what he's missing in it...ME! I been told Im very good for cardio. And he doesn't appear to hold back, and I'm not complaining. I will forever be addicted to South Americans I believe...they always seems to be so uninhibited ....and they also make good towel racks.

I bet you won't find this towel rack at Ikea.

Friday, February 12, 2021

IN THREE WORDS

 In this weekly feature, Ill share a weekly guest with you all, and you tell me in only three words what comes to mind.

In three words...

Isabella Blow

SCROTOX

 Now... for those of you wondering, no Scrotox is not the sister group to Drag Race's Rolaskatox. Scrotox is a real thing...and it's becoming even more poplar. As if the beauty and cosmetics industry doesn't already put enough pressure on everyone to have every square inch in pitch perfect shape! Now, I'm all about keeping fit, and eating right most of the time, and will keep a very regimented skincare routine, and even pamper myself with massages, but I'm here to tell yawl,  I'm no about to get botox injections in my balls, hell, I don't even do them on my face. But Scrotox is the latest trend in extreme grooming for men and has come across from Europe. In fact, doctors are expecting this new procedure to become significantly more popular in 2021.

Don't you just get a kick out of Cubby's testimonial?????

 I'm not going to say anything against more traditional Botox treatments. Some people make a living with their face, and no one wants to look at a beaten leather bag that has a face that looks like a mud fence...but I do think some go way to far with it. (Love you Dolly to bits, but you don't look human anymore.) However, we're talking about a literal sack of skin here, and just how many people see your balls? Ok. I'm not going to answer that, but moving on. Scrotox supposedly has reported benefits. One of which is treatment for excessive sweating,  but the primary benefit seems to be that it smooth out the wrinkle on the balls, and make them hang lower, and look bigger. Then there are those who have reported that it has improved their sex life. Yup, the buzz is that it increases sensitivity in the boys downstairs.

I blame these damn Instagram influencers and porn stars, who seem to be the major suckers, opps, I mean consumers, of this procedure. One of my favorite big, young, and very dumb hunks, Reno Gold swears by it. Thank god he's pretty. But to be honest, he always had very nice big low hangers anyway, and I don't know they look different to me. Visual aids for your viewing pleasure......


And here he was in a video getting the injection...

Now doesn't that just look like fun?? I will say from the back though, the doctor could handle my balls if he wanted!!! Just saying. But when you get down to it, what woman or man has ever rejected a man's advances after seeing his balls were wrinkly? And in my years and years and years of very in-depth studies and  researching the cock, and doing my technical procedures, I've yet met two lowing hanging boys I didn't like.  I have also heard that if getting this done it also affects the quality and count of your semen if your planning to have babies. Now, to be honest, I love my balls. The ex, used to call them "orbs of loveliness" or doorstops. And if I can be TMI, the Lad is all about them, and his thing is all about taking them in orally and pleasing the hell out of them. Are they smooth? hell no, but they are not far off from the picture about. You see, in my skincare regime...my balls are part of that. Once out of the shower, mostly in the winter, I always body moisturize, and that includes all my equipment. Winter is harsh on the skin. But twice a week I use a vitamin E & sesame oil, once out of the shower, and work it in real nice. I'm very pleased my goods are velvety soft. And to be honest, when pleasing myself or having sex(what's that btw) with the Lad, I've been know to use coconut oil. Oh my!!!!! I'm highly recommend it. Oh great, now none of you will eat my dinner or baked goods again. 

I'm so pleased by my balls I thought Id show you a picture.

Here's the thing guys , instead of spending $400-$600 on a weird procedure that takes 45 mins and last four months, just send me the money, along with a picture of your balls, or just stop by the Casa du Borghese, and Ill give you all the pep talk and special attention your balls need...you'll feel like a new man by time I'm done baby. I'm all about doing good to help my fellow man.
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