Wednesday, November 30, 2022


I was in a Mabel mood today. 

Adore her and her energy.  I never seem to like anyone mainstream; I swear. Mabel is a Spanish born, Swedish singer and songwriter and came into her own back in 2017, but it was her hit in 2022 Let Them Know, that really grabbed me. I just love the vibe and energy and "tude" of the song. I like it so much; I'm trying the choro for doing the song for one of the Woods drag shows next summer. A fun fact about Mabel, her parents are none other than English music producer Carmeron McVey and Swedish singer, Neneh Cherry, who in 89 is solely remembered for her huge hit, Buffalo Stance. Both her parents were supportive of her expressing herself through music and writing a journal.

Go ahead girls, hit play!

Tuesday, November 29, 2022


It was years ago, now, and probably the only good thing I remember, or even liked from being in Texas, the Heavyweight Champion, Mistress Isabelle Brooks, a plus sized queen with a plus sized attitude to match. Her show was entertaining and what a presence she had on the stage. She's a dancing diva with some serious disco fever, and there's not a whole lot that can slow this bitch down when she gets steam up!!! Born and raised in Houston TX, Isabelle describes her style as over the top traditional drag with a modern twist. Of course, I was in love right then. Glamorous ensembles, big, higher the hair to God wigs, and just captivating. She believes old school drag is dying out, and vows to continue its style to the next generation. And it's no wonder her wigs are so stunning and huge, hair has always been a passion of hers way before drag and envisioned a career as a hairstylist. That love led to her styling all her own wigs...and not long after, word of mouth spread of her jaw dropping double and triple wig stacking. It wasn't till the pandemic hit and drag shut down, that her talent for hair gave her a way to take care of herself financially, as she moved from styling wigs just for herself and close friends, to those queens far and wide. It wasn't long before her wigs were traveling to queens all over the world, and she eventually started up her own wig company,  Wigs By Mistress. Big money too. I once got a double stacked from her at a mere $395. Love this queen and wouldn't surprise me if she has big things on the horizon.

Monday, November 28, 2022


Doesn't houseboy Puck look cute modeling the Freakin' Green Elf Shorts for the winner???

The caption competition came and went, and we ended up with around 61 comments and lots of chatter. There was quite a few excellent comments and some that had me laughing out loud, only to be followed with do no enter.

Some of the honorary mentions.

Mahogany Empress- "Tinkerbell Gone Wrong"

Midnight Magpie-"You couldn't handle me, even if I came with instructions."
*makes mental note to get that on a tee shirt*

Rimpy Rimpington-Frustrated Homeowner: Excuse me. Could you please get off my porch? You're scaring away the other trick-or-treaters. And aren't you a little old to be dressing up for Halloween?

Mistress Maddie: Who says I'm wearing a costume?

FHO: That's it! I'm calling the...Wait! Are those Freakin' Green Elf Shorts? Sorry, kids, we just ran out of candy!

*flings bowl of fun-sized candy bars to the restless mob, grabs Maddie by the hand, slams door shut behind them and turns off porch light*

Inexplicable DeVice-"Pam demic keeps her legs crossed in order to prevent the release of something worse than COVID!"

Normadesmond-"Im not here for the gifts, only to warn you the silicone's leaking."

Duchess Deedles- "Ariel,the gin and regret years."

Mistress Maddie's #1 Fan- "Ass 10-Tits -3"

Oh.... now houseboy Lukus wants to model the Freaking Green Elf Shorts!

And now, the time has come to lip synch FOR YOURRRRRR LIFE, and don't fuck it...oh opps, wrong show. And now the honorary, non-blog winner goes to Tundra Bunny with this comment "Santa wouldn't touch those FGES with his 10 foot North Pole." Congrats Tundra and thanks for playing!!!! 

Now for the Grand winner of the Legendary Freakin' Green Elf Shorts, bragging rights, hosting of the next Freakin' Green Elf Shorts competition, not to mention the entrance into a league of a few and utterly crazy bloggerati from around the globe, and a trove of little souvenirs from my neck of the Planet goes too.....

Janie Junebug!!!!!!!!! 
Congratulations girl!!!!! You're the winner of the next leg of this blog tradition!!!!!! And the protector and attend of the all powerful Freakin" Green Elf Shorts!!!!! Her winning comment-

There once was a fellow named Maddie
And if you were a fine pool boy, he'd have ye
And when he was done
In his tacky green elf shorts he'd tuck away his 14 inch one
And that was fun for our Maddie! 

If for some reason Janie Junebug can't fulfill her title, then the second runner up will then be crowned the winner, that of Rimpy Rimpington, will then be crowned the freakin winner to fill the title.

Congrats to Janie and Tundra Bunny... and when you two get a chance email me at so I can get your address for mailing the parcels...especially Janie, I can't wait to unload these shorts fast enough!!!!! Now just to be clear, the houseboys don't come with the Freakin' Green Elf Shorts.

Enjoy and Goodnight!!!



Can you believe that we have only 33 days left of this year??? Where does the time ago? It's back to work this week, after a nice three-day weekend. After all the family left late Friday, I had scheduled myself a day of pamper Saturday...started with a haircut, then went in for a full body massage, a body wrap, facial, a manicure and pedicure...the works girls!!! Heavens knows, since the pandemic, I haven't been into a day of pamper, since. I was beginning to look like Scarlet O Hara, who was working on the plantation, to keep Tara from foreclosing. Well, she is all gleaming again!!!! Nothing worse than when your men, notice you have the skin and hands of a fieldhand. I'm much far too relaxed going into work today. Wait. I hate Mondays, did I just say that. Enjoy the day kids. Have a coffee, and enjoy the day Later tonight we have the announcement of the winner of the Freaking Green Elf Shorts!!!

Saturday, November 26, 2022


Talk about a man taking one's breath away.....

This week in the Candy Shop is a no holds bar handsome hottie treat I may have been holding back on sharing. This eye candy is sure to melt in the hands and mouth of whoever handles it. Meet Tanguy LeClerc. If I spotted this guy on the street while on a bike, I would have probably hit the brakes so hard, I'd probably wreck. Mr Clerc is a 29-year-old who is working and living in Monaco where he shares a passion for self-betterment through his work as a personal development instructor whether it be physical or mental and intellectually. He's not your average personal trainer. His love for animals originally lead him to go to veterinary school, but soon learned that it was too painful to see animals in distress, and his calling for physical activity was too strong, with his hyperactivity disorder.  So, he went into helping people with personal training and also mental work outs. While not a psychologist, he does feel the need that a mental work out is just as important, and he has since put efforts into other avenues of helping animals. All that, and he modeled and one summer was a go -go dancer. Man, that French face, and that glowing smile just radiates!!! Let's us also not that physique!!!! Then there's that French accent....swoon. This man just gives off such happy and positive vibes to me. He also apparently likes nice conversation after an orgasm. Well, if he needs to work that hyperactivity out, lucky for him I have ways to work hyperactivity out, and not to mention, I talk a lot after sex.

There now...are we all weak in the knees???

I might need a stiff drink...

Friday, November 25, 2022


It's here. The day Americans show their worst traits .... greed, shopping gluttony, and consumerism!!! And being suckers for deals they think they are getting.  I don't recall us ever really shopping this day when I was a wee one. We were often still in a food coma from the day before, and would continue spending time with family. This will be the first time in close to 29 years I don't have to work on a Black Friday!!!! And since I work for a huge furniture company in its showroom, Black Friday is not a huge thing for us, if any. It was left up to me whether to come in or not. And it was a NOT!!! So, it's a three-day weekend kids. Friends often ask if I miss doing visual display with department stores for all those years. And the answers is yes, some days I still do miss it, and seeing the people's reactions to your work, and getting the store and windows ready for holidays was magical and rewarding. Even though we weren't considered essential store staff, we were always required to be at the store on Black Friday's at 6am to ready the store, and be there to lend support, and be on hand in case something went awry with a display, or a mannequin would get stripped. It often meant very speedy visits with family, being in and out for a tasty dinner, before I'd have to hit the road to return home. I couldn't even enjoy a cocktail. Some of the worst 8 hours of my life. So, in that's a big fat NO, I don't miss that, nor do I miss witnessing all the grabby, spoiled, consumeristic cattle crowds and the "Oh I have to have that" attitude. Hell no!!! So, this new job has been great. I lucked out with working with a good, fun, crew of co-workers, and I can basically create my own schedule. And for that, I'm grateful. 

Let's get in the mood with some fabulous legendary gals, with the likes of Carmen Dell'Orefice, Dovima, Suzy Parker, Dorian Leigh and the stunning "Catwalk Contessa" herself, Marpessa Hennink

Enjoy your Black Friday!