A MEMORIAL

 

Yesterday we were able to have some closure and a lovely memorial service on a beautiful if chilly afternoon, for my talented yet wildly and wickedly humorous cousin. We were always close as we were close in age to many of the others. He was the son of my late favorite aunt who was one of my role models. He passed on in September, a very unexpected and abrupt death, and one due to an exploded liver from cirrhosis, caused by a drink problem. He had been doing AA and counselling, but he kept the drinking so well hidden to everyone, when we had though he had it under control. We all agreed we wished we could have seen more signs or did more to help him. He was excellent at masking things. He thought of everyone else first... and made everyone laugh, even thought it was evident in the last days, he had been in a dark place. Darker than any of us knew. The family, his siblings, all 6, and their families from California, Texas, Washinton, Alaska, Colorado Mass, Maine, and DC, as well as friends and musicians from far and wide all showed up to join us. It was great hearing and sharing the stories we had not heard of him. We had no idea he was even in contact with friends from music school days still. Even two college friends attended. One of my uncle's students he taught at the time was even present. We held it in nature, at a park across the street from where my uncle Jack's house. We all came together to share our stories, the good and the bad and the sad, we listened to his music, drank ,ate, read favorite poems, and one friend of his even sang a song. The quartet he belonged too played his favorite... the Second movement of Beethoven's String Quartet, Opus 132. 

There was much laughter, which he would have loved, tears and hugs. New friendships made. I plan to keep in contract with a friend of his named Peter from Philadelphia. Robbie was quite something. He was an extremely talented violaist. He at 3, started on the violin, but found he liked the voila better. He once asked me if I knew why musicians in the voila section didn't get hemorrhoids. He replied, because all the assholes were in the violin section!!!! Just a touch of his sense of twisted humor. When it came to playing though he was the consummate professional. Always dressed to the nines...and played so precise. He played at most family weddings and at Christmas for the family.  He played and been the principal violist with the Haddonfield, Bridgeton, Delaware Symphonies and at times with the Philadelphia Orchestra. His longest tenure was with the Chattanooga Symphony for over 15 years. He was a graduate of the Manhattan School of Music, and then eventually got his master's in music at Temple University. On the other hand, he could be quite impish, a irrepressible, sharp wit, wickedly humorous and enormously creative.  Even twisted. He could make a room laugh or whine in shock. His jokes usually had the "ohhhh that was bad" punchlines or could take time to tell. He loved cooking, and often said he might have been a chef had he not went into music. His dinners were wonderful, but he was also famous for his food combinations...like a lettuce, mustard and peanut butter sandwich. One thanksgiving I remember him commenting on the turkey greased infuse onions that were left over in the roaster and telling him I'd give him 5 bucks to eat one. He gleefully crammed it in his mouth, drippings running down his chin. I gave him the 5 and he said he'd done it for free! And one never knew what jokes or stories would come up at the dinner table, to the dismay of my proper aunt. He also had the talent of making many feel they  were the most important person to him when you talked to him.

 

When he was in Chattanooga living, he got quite the reputation there, and in Nashville for not only his music but also a comic he used to draw for fun, became a second career. It went on for 8 years in the Pulse, a local paper, till he moved. The paper weekly ran his cartoons called Lockout Mountain under the name Trebor Redle, his name spelled backwards. He created a few me as well.  What could be said of his cartoons? One thing I can say is that one never, and I mean never, knew what he would come up with next. One thing was certain, they rarely failed to entertain if not force one to choke on your beverage mid sip when you saw one of. My first reaction to seeing one was What in the blood and stomach pills is this??? One lady present from the paper showed up and regaled, one of his visits to the paper, where Robbie dropped his trouser in the middle of the office and begun mooning everyone, including onlookers who happened pass the front doors. The building management wasn't to pleased she said, but explained it was a cost of doing business with him. Of course, everyone laughed. But then there was his volunteering to coach and teach kids music. Once moved back to Harrisburg he taught and instructed kids music lessons at no charge.  And a huge nature lover. I knew ashes would be divided up to anyone wanting to take some to spread in some of his old haunts, so I took packets of wildflower seeds for everyone...to be put in the ground with his ashes. I figured Wildflowers for his memory would be the perfect choice. It was also decided by the family that his viola that was custom made for him by a legendary viola maker would go back to its maker, who would then find a suitable steward to care and play its magical notes. I think Robbie would approve of the instrument getting another life and owner. I do know that somewhere in nature Robbie is playing his favorite Beethoven piece.

 I leave you with some of his comic works.

Here's a colorful interview link too.