Wednesday, December 19, 2018

MIDWEEK CHUCKLES

A few chuckles this time of year never hurt anyone.

Well, it aint gonna suck itself is it!


And speaking of Melanie, have you seen the White House décor???
Who wore it better? The White House or the cast Handmaid's Tale?


If your bored tonight, take movie title or a tv show, and switch one word for dick! I'll go first.... Dick Horror Story.


Friends of mine caught Bunny the other night in a show with the famous Madame! I had to email and ask her if she got laid by Madame. Bunny is one to never pass up a piece of good wood.


With the shopping season in full swing, after work I went to do a little shopping for a few gifts and decided to treat myself with my own gift since I've been working like a dog. So I went into Build-A-Bear. Course, having never been in there, I wasn't sure how the process worked and requested help. The male associate asked what I wanted.  I say hi and told him the bear had to be 6'3", at least hairy, duh, strong and built, but could be a bit chubby and had to have a big dick.  He replied , Sir, I think you have the wrong about what we do here.

And how many time have you heard this from a guy?

And after my embarrassing shopping escapade, I decide to go to happy hour to a new bar and order a G&T. Smithy's the bartender asked what was my team, to which I replied "Gay".  And he replied, "Football?"  to which I replied," oh , no thank you. " Then neither of us knew where to go with this mess of a conversation,  so we just sat in silence.

40 comments:

  1. "the sound of dick", "west side dick", "the dick couple", "send me no dicks", "blazing dicks".

    aaaaaaand I just peed myself laughing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I myself am watching A Christmas Dick tonight.

      Delete
    2. @Maddie I hear White Dick is a holiday favorite.

      Delete
    3. That's good.... but I prefer Dick in Connecticut.

      Delete
    4. Holiday Dick?

      Delete
  2. The Big Dick Theory. The Dick Bang Theory. The Big Bang Dick. Seven Dicks for Seven Brothers. Calamity Dick. Dick 13. The Undickable Molly Brown.
    Stop me!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Dick is a Lonely Hunter. Pillow Dick. Fun With Dick and Dick. The Dicks in the Band. Saratoga Dick.

      See what you started, mistress maddie?

      Delete
    2. Deedles, Im trying to watch my BBC comedies right now, Keeping Up Dicks, and As Dicks go By, do you mind?

      Delete
    3. You started this crap, sunshine, so don't be a prick about it!

      Delete
    4. May I recommend Frosty the Snow Dick for your holiday merriment viewing?

      Delete
    5. Don't make me pull out Rudolph the Red Dicked Reindeer! Maybe the action packed Dick Hard starring Bruce Willy.

      Delete
    6. I don't know about action packed , but if you like star studded cast, I recommend Dick on the Orient Express. I love a good "Who done it."

      Delete
    7. @Bryon- sounds like a good one! I still enjoy Alfred Hitchcock's Dick. That shower scene is still scary! If you're into the superhero stuff, Guardians of the Dick is pretty good.

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. Now Mother your, of few words tonight...and I damn well know RuPaul's Dick Race isn't on tonight.

      Delete
  4. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What did you have at happy hour dear! I am in tears from these!!!!!

    Now off to catch up on Dick or No Deal.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm in tears here Mistress!!!!!! That White House one and the Misery meme NAILED IT!

    ReplyDelete
  6. With Madame's nose, Im sure she fucked Bunny but good with it!!!!

    Tomorrow Im taking a break and off to see the Nutcracker and the Four Dicks.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I laughed at each and every one of those memes!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh come on people... the build a bear joke was the best, it's ok Maddie darling, I laughed at it, clever. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now Steven, all of it was very funny! You will notice, that Maddie invited us to play, sort of. Some of us may have over done it, but some of us may have eaten waaaay too many bourbon balls! Since you didn't play I'll throw in an extra one. Dick at Tiffany's. I'm going to sleep off my balls now, hic.

      Delete
  9. That first one could be me out on saturday night!!!! Now my favorite show is How to Get Away with Dick.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Now mistress....This won't hurt a bit!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How many times a week does he wear that!?!?!?!?!

      Delete
  11. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! That build a bear got we. Thank goodness I'm home still, otherwise I might have needed a change. The whole is funny.

    ReplyDelete
  12. This all made me smile. When our great niece was 4, she pointed Elf on the Shelf and said, “Look at it! Please!!! It’s not even real! Watch! His eyes never move!”

    ReplyDelete
  13. Oh. My. God. This post (and the thread) got me in HYSTERICS. I got the hiccups.
    Oh, Mistress. You crack me up.

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  14. spouse has a few: "from dick to eternity", "dick with the wind", "the best dick of our lives", "gone with the dick".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. when ouch comes to shove, the mistress always goes with dick.

      Delete
    2. and you know all about that, amirite? you just KNOW we talked about you last saturday...

      Delete
  15. I'm just glad I'm not the only one to wet my pants....and I just got up!!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Star Wars: The Dick Strikes Back.
    Thanks for the laughs - we all needed that.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh mistress!!!!! Me done sprayed my coffee again!!! How many times this year????? I myself watch 60 Dicks every sunday... I watch alot on BBC myself.

    And that Sarah Saunders meme scared the hell out of me. What a good laugh, even William enjoyed that.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I wonder if they really are trying to mock the Handmaid's Tale in the Trump White House. What the hell else would that mean?

    Anyway, a lot of funny stuff today, maddie.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Mistress, your on a roll with the holiday cheer lately. I dont know which post was funnier, this or the drunken egg nog!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. "Build a bear" loved that!! Maybe you should open a shop... Build a bear, build and otter... you know?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. build a cub, build a twink, build a daddy...

      Delete
  21. Wait...did someone mention dick?

    ReplyDelete
  22. You whipped out some real good ones this time!!!!!! I'm with Herbie. Last time I heard this went hurt much, I needed a shoe to bite on!!!!

    ReplyDelete

Go ahead darling, tell me something fabulous!