Well, last night yet again, was a country club event, where I had the pleasure of running into the neighborhood busy body, but one everybody knows drinks on the quiet. Ulele Griswald was on hand, with her hands gloved and her cape flying, and her lips flapping, telling Claire Pits-Seymour and Phoebe Bixler how applaud she was seeing my red lights yet again this year, and the coming and going of the men. I told her, perhaps her squeaky wheel got more oil, she'd be in a better mood. But the whispers continued into the night before the Mistress had enough gin, and was caught on film.
Don’t think I don’t know who’s been spreading gossip about me. After all the nice things I’ve said about that hag. When I get hold of her, I’ll tear out every hair of her mustache!
"I told her perhaps if her squeaky wheel got more oil, she'd be in a better mood." - THAT'S what's wrong with the one million moms and all those xstains! nobody's greasing their hamster wheels! fucking bitches!
ReplyDeleteMistress! Anne Marie lives too close to you to get her all worked up like this! Oh the humanity if she's ever around this kind of behavior towards our Maddie in person! The blue air alone would smother the busybodies!
ReplyDeletedamn str8 (or gay), duchess!
DeleteWhen I get hold of her, I’ll tear out every hair of her mustache!
ReplyDeleteBWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*makes a mental note to get a waxing*
ReplyDeleteOuchy, ouchy
ReplyDeleteOhhh I so want to be there once the mistress has had enough gin....
ReplyDeleteXoXo
have you ever been to a fireworks show? same thing.
Deletegood gracious!! :-)
ReplyDeletethat's what she said.
DeleteIt's so much easier when the neighbor happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier, right Mistress?
ReplyDeletewith a nice package down below, pearly!
DeleteHell, I can see the mustache from here. If I were her, I'd sue.
ReplyDeleteShould I ever end up in a scuffle with a bunch a hungry society women, I'm calling on you!!!
ReplyDeleteI too thought the closing caption a hoot !
ReplyDeleteCat fight!!!
ReplyDeleteOh my God! That last line is hysterical. You can also suggest some of that concealer they use in theater makeup to cover that caterpillar.
ReplyDeleteDoesn't she know that the Red Light district there is a legendary institution?
ReplyDeleteShe's just jealous of you, Mistress! As are we all!
ReplyDeleteWhenever anyone has the gaul to claim that you are an easy piece of goods to be had for the price of cocktail, I immediately defend you, firmly claiming there is nothing easy about you.
ReplyDeleteHere here!!!! It takes at least three cocktails!
DeleteOh what the neighbors say about us, when we aren't around.
ReplyDeleteMistress, it’s only gossip if it isn’t true, isn’t it? I think she’s just jealous of your good fortune.
ReplyDeleteShe should know the mistress is not to be trifled with.
ReplyDeleteOoh, can I go on a rant like that. I'm currently going through an "i hate humanity" phase.
ReplyDelete