SCROTOX

 Now... for those of you wondering, no Scrotox is not the sister group to Drag Race's Rolaskatox. Scrotox is a real thing...and it's becoming even more poplar. As if the beauty and cosmetics industry doesn't already put enough pressure on everyone to have every square inch in pitch perfect shape! Now, I'm all about keeping fit, and eating right most of the time, and will keep a very regimented skincare routine, and even pamper myself with massages, but I'm here to tell yawl,  I'm no about to get botox injections in my balls, hell, I don't even do them on my face. But Scrotox is the latest trend in extreme grooming for men and has come across from Europe. In fact, doctors are expecting this new procedure to become significantly more popular in 2021.

Don't you just get a kick out of Cubby's testimonial?????

 I'm not going to say anything against more traditional Botox treatments. Some people make a living with their face, and no one wants to look at a beaten leather bag that has a face that looks like a mud fence...but I do think some go way to far with it. (Love you Dolly to bits, but you don't look human anymore.) However, we're talking about a literal sack of skin here, and just how many people see your balls? Ok. I'm not going to answer that, but moving on. Scrotox supposedly has reported benefits. One of which is treatment for excessive sweating,  but the primary benefit seems to be that it smooth out the wrinkle on the balls, and make them hang lower, and look bigger. Then there are those who have reported that it has improved their sex life. Yup, the buzz is that it increases sensitivity in the boys downstairs.

I blame these damn Instagram influencers and porn stars, who seem to be the major suckers, opps, I mean consumers, of this procedure. One of my favorite big, young, and very dumb hunks, Reno Gold swears by it. Thank god he's pretty. But to be honest, he always had very nice big low hangers anyway, and I don't know they look different to me. Visual aids for your viewing pleasure......

And here he was in a video getting the injection...

Now doesn't that just look like fun?? I will say from the back though, the doctor could handle my balls if he wanted!!! Just saying. But when you get down to it, what woman or man has ever rejected a man's advances after seeing his balls were wrinkly? And in my years and years and years of very in-depth studies and  researching the cock, and doing my technical procedures, I've yet met two lowing hanging boys I didn't like.  I have also heard that if getting this done it also affects the quality and count of your semen if your planning to have babies. Now, to be honest, I love my balls. The ex, used to call them "orbs of loveliness" or doorstops. And if I can be TMI, the Lad is all about them, and his thing is all about taking them in orally and pleasing the hell out of them. Are they smooth? hell no, but they are not far off from the picture about. You see, in my skincare regime...my balls are part of that. Once out of the shower, mostly in the winter, I always body moisturize, and that includes all my equipment. Winter is harsh on the skin. But twice a week I use a vitamin E & sesame oil, once out of the shower, and work it in real nice. I'm very pleased my goods are velvety soft. And to be honest, when pleasing myself or having sex(what's that btw) with the Lad, I've been know to use coconut oil. Oh my!!!!! I'm highly recommend it. Oh great, now none of you will eat my dinner or baked goods again. 

I'm so pleased by my balls I thought Id show you a picture.

Here's the thing guys , instead of spending $400-$600 on a weird procedure that takes 45 mins and last four months, just send me the money, along with a picture of your balls, or just stop by the Casa du Borghese, and Ill give you all the pep talk and special attention your balls need...you'll feel like a new man by time I'm done baby. I'm all about doing good to help my fellow man.