IN THREE WORDS

In this feature, I'll share a weekly guest with you all, 

and you tell me in only three words what comes to mind.

In Three Words...

George Washington Carver

RIGGED RACE?

Yes... Crystal is doing fine y'all! After all kids, she is a professional. But I can say it was safe to say after her elimination last week she was not happy in the slightest when this was still fresh in the filming process. To say Crystal was one of the stronger queens would be an understatement. This pageant queen from Asbury and drag friend had been consistently doing well since she landed in the top two for her talent number and had been killing most of the challenges and runways. In talking to Crystal, she said that her elimination was not "particularly justifiable, making for one of the most shocking eliminations in recent seasons. And while I don't think she would have made the top four, she most certainly should have gone on much further than this early exit. Granted, the Nicole Richie impersonation in Snatch Game sucked balls, as did Lana Ja Rae's Rosa Parks...but when it came to the runway....again...just what in the flying fuck did the judges see??? Crystal's runway for the nails theme was out of the box and much more evolved in technique, talent and creativity, then Lana's. Lana's look seemed way to poorly handmade and not executed very well. Of course all season to this point, she has been very underwhelming with her looks. She is so thin, everything looks very awkward on her, and everything looks so thrown together. And the same with Kori King. How many exposed legs and body suits are we going to see??? Since both queens bombed in the Snatch Game, I feel Lana's runway was just as bad, and she should have been sent packing.

Which leads me to...the show is rigged, no matter what Mama Ru says. If you're in the know, on the drag circuit and involved in the drag world, and know many in the world of drag, it pretty common knowledge from season 6 or 7, the show was getting rigged and scripted. Now a regular viewer watches and enjoys it, which it is still fun, but let's make this a fair game for any queen to have a chance. Most of us queens, every season, can peg who the top four will be. It is almost painfully oblivious. And when MM#1 Fan worked at World of Wonder he even told me that many queens on previous season even knew they would be top four! Now, I know this has just become nothing more than a competition show, and most queens apply and go on the show, knowing they will be filler queens. They are happy to just get on the show to jump start them to another level. But part of that bothers me. Are we giving the crown to already seasoned, well known queens, and forgoing real natural talent? I mean to me, the only queens on this season that I would really want to see a show from is Onya Nurve Lexi Love, and Suzie Toot. They have talent. The talent show episode has become a joke. Sure, lip-synching is tough if you do it right...but is that talent?  I really love the girls who do the real talent like Suzie did and Acacia Forgot had, or like what Sasha Velour did her season or even Trixie Matell.  I guess my point is, are we propping and cultivating real talent and good drag queens or just in this for a storyline and drama? Because if I had been judging, Lana and Kori, would have been gone before Hormona Lisa. And DONT EVEN get me started on the dunk tank. I didn't like that at all. If they were not up to par and were told to sashay away because of elimination, then why reward them to "win" a chance to say on?  I still watch, but for me the real show doesn't even start, like most of my queen friends till the top four. 

But werk Crystal!!!! I'll catch you in Asbury girl.

And yes kids, I caught the show as Catwoman in Asbury a couple years ago. WOW! You couldn't tell me it wasn't Michelle Pfeiffer.

CHUCKLES

You know what I said to one of my gentleman suitors the other night? I said "Chadwick, you're like a slinky. You have no real purpose, and it would give me a great pleasure to push you down a flight of stairs."

Valentine's Day was last week, and the Lad texted and asked if he could be my Valentine." I said hell no you can't, for medical reasons." He said " What? What medical reasons? I said to him, Yes, for medical reasons, because you make me sick." Then he told me he got his taxes done on Valentines Day. And I said, "Why is that Adrien" He said, " Well, it was the only way I was going to get fucked." And then you know what he said? " You know Mistress, before you I had a boyfriend in every state. I said, "Yeah, right Adrien. State of denial, State of regret and State of remorse."

And then do you know what he said to me last night? The smart ass. "Mistress, how do you communicate with a MAGA Republican anti vaxxer?" And I said, "How Adrien" And he said, "Through a Ouija Board." Then he asked me if a knew what bordered on stupidity? I said, What Adrien? And he said, Canada and Mexico."

What really goes in in the Ovel Office....

While having coffee with my good friend Mame the other day she asked if I'd heard about the MAGA Republican that got rushed to the hospital by shoving 30 toy horses up his ass. I said, "Really Mame? How's his condition?" Mame said, "Stable." But I shared with her a study I read. It said that 50% of MAGA men don't fall asleep right after sex. Mame said, I wonder why? I said," Because, they still have to drive home from their mistress's house."

Even Warbucks is something else. He told me the other night on the phone if I ever need a kidney transplant, he'd donate me one of his. I said, "This is an awful conversation, but that is nice to know, but what if my body doesn't except it." And he said, Oh, Mistress, I'm not worried, your body hasn't rejected any organ in the last 15 years."

LET US PRAY

 The Casa du Borghese Altar of Patron Saints is almost complete!

While the Casa du Borghese has many Patron Saints, these are the most major ones....

Ann Miller, Patron Saint of huge, fabulous hair and Talented Taps.

Amy Winehouse, Our Patron Saint of Song, Libations and Wing Eyeliner.

Luigi Mangione- Patron Saint of Adorable Rogue-ness, Killer Smiles, and Antiheros

RuPaul, Patron Saint of Creativeness, Uniqueness Nerve and Talent.

Joan Crawford, Patron Saint of Style, Good Housekeeping, and Giving No Fucks.

And soon, the collection will be complete with the Ultimate Patron Saint....

Lady Bunny, Patron Saint of Filth, Mod Style, and Drag Queens.

Let us bow our heads......