Saturday, February 1, 2014

MING CRYSTALS IS BACK

Whilst the Mistress had a long week at work and is bushed from all the drag drama of drag history month, I'll be out and about on the town with friends. In the meantime my lovely, fabulous, Official Astrologer, Ming Crystals is back for the Orient for the weekend to entertain you..........
 

 I never make any decisions without her guidance and wisdom..... so let my houseboys get you your favorite libation, and my Mandarin beauty answer life's mysteries or questions for you. Go ahead, ask away, before she hits the sake to hard........ 

63 comments:

  1. COOL Ming is back! Ming, I do believe I have a sexual addiction and trying to control it. Will I ever stay on track and control the urges?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no. Ming see many California kings and many falls off this wagon.

      Delete
    2. Well it doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to answer this one.

      Delete
  2. Im feeling blue , but sort of naughty today and don't know which way to go. Any advice?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming say, don't feel blue,You have unusual equipment for success, use it properly

      Delete
  3. Ming darling, am I wearing the right concealer, I think my pores look huge?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no. Ming thought she was seeing pores on the moon.

      Delete
    2. you are a astounding beauty, what is your secret?

      Delete
  4. Ming I sometimes feel inadequate with my male junk being small, and feel my boy friend is never pleased. Should I be worried?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no. Ming say if you think you’re too small to be effective, you’ve never been in bed with a mosquito .

      Delete
  5. What could I possibly ask of her? Your beauty alone says everything. FIERCE!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming see you have ultimate good taste.

      Delete
  6. I used to love going out, but now as a older queen, I just think going out, the youngins will just poke fun. Should I venture out again and see what's new on the scene?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming says get out and live, life has much offering and surprises. Beside, SWAT team may show up and mistake you for hostage situation.

      Delete
  7. I can see why the Mistress has you around your stunning!!!! Im bored today, what should I do?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. a new pair of shoes will do a world of good!

      Delete
  8. While you are fabulous, I don't know I believe in astrology or palm readings, what possibly could a palm say? Houseboy, drink please!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh hunky one, palm can say a lot...espaecially when it SMACK! Just ask Rihanna.

      Delete
  9. Ming my partner will be home soon, after a long hard day at work. Can you give me an idea surprise him with?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming say a tub and a rub will change his day.

      Delete
  10. I have a co-worker who drives me nuts with smart gay cracks, and warrants her opinion all the time, and want to tell her about it. Should I say something to her?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A closed mouth gathers no feet .

      Delete
  11. So I'm married, but do like men too. A friend of mine said he would let me experiment with anal sex but I worry. Is that going to hurt.?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming say every exit is a entrance to new experiences.

      Delete
  12. She's not the only one who's back. Guess who had to create a Google account for their Android phone today?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming can feel pain. She understand Google can be evil and pain in back side.

      Delete
  13. Replies
    1. Don't look now, but fly is down.

      Delete
  14. Ming, will I ever drip in diamonds and crystals like your self?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You will drip in things but not crystals dear.

      Delete
  15. Oh Ming you are so stunning and take my breath away! Now, I have always been happy all my life, will I continue to be happy as ever?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Life you be happy for you dear. Until the end, when you wet yourself a lot.

      Delete
  16. I am going on a date this week with a guy I've been wanting a date with, how far should I go on the first date? Thanks the Mistress for this !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming say enjoy yourself and don't take aboard more than you can swallow

      Delete
  17. Replies
    1. Never tease a armed midget with a high five

      Delete
  18. Ming, you are just too fabulous and sexy! I bet you could use a drink.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why I couldn't Mistress might be cross...oh, you twist arm, How about a Tokyo Surprise.

      Delete
  19. What two thing can you tell me about myself?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming sees you enjoy forward thrusts and the future.

      Delete
  20. How do you feel about marriage Ming? Is it a good thing to marry ,will it be fun?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh Ming fond of marriage. Give you the right to annoy the same person over and over again.

      Delete
  21. I'd like to know when the Mistress will give me a raise.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming sees Mistress as given you may good "rises" on my occasion.

      Delete
  22. I really need to relax and enjoy life more Any suggestions?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Learn how to masturbate… may come in handy!

      Delete
  23. waste so much time on line looking at porn. Is that really a bad thing?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Man is like spider. Bound to have sticky hand after being on web.

      Delete
  24. Do you believe all that glitters is gold ming?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Scarlett apparently not been to Café Royale.

      Delete
  25. I'm going to introduce feathers in the bedroom for a beau, is that too weird? Will I ever be as fabulous as yourself?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming say defeather chicken first, then ok. Only Ming will shine bright like a diamond dear.

      Delete
  26. I have another, what do you think of G strings?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming find people who wear G-string, high on crack!

      Delete
  27. I often wonder if I should have had my self circumcised . I don't know now if I like it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming experience is man who have circumcision, lose a bit of foresight

      Delete
  28. Ming you are too beautiful! My regards to the Mistress. Now WHO will win the Super Bowl today?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming see a pile of feathers behind from those birds. She put crystal stock in mountain city.

      Delete
  29. Will I ever find true love again, wise Ming, if so, where should I look ???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ming see much love! Have you tried the service station? Much surprise come from the glory hole in stall, where the lotus blossom will bloom into love

      Delete
  30. Ming must now, I do believe she has had too much sake. Lets give her a huge hand for those ,huh, foretelling's shall we!!!! Now Ming go with the houseboys. TILL next time. I do believe her equilibrium is off from you guys.

    ReplyDelete

Go ahead darling, tell me something fabulous!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...