Wednesday, December 17, 2014

THE MISTRESS'S HOLIDAY ADVICE

With this time of year, we can all get stressed out what with all the things on our list to get done, the miserable bitches in the malls and plazas, social functions to attend and fitting them in, baking and cooking to do, and the decorations, visiting family, getting the furs out of cold storage, and not to mention work and work parties. People are always amazed how I handle it what such finesse and not giving two figs. Well lambchops, I am going to share with you my little secrets on how to.......
 
 
First off, you have to know where to find your Christmas spirit.
 Plan accordingly, know when the holidays are coming
 
Instead of buying gifts , bake something thoughtful and dodge the malls
 
Make sure to get exercise, Winter sports are fun!!!
 
Screw the food diets, why be unhappy.
 
I never set to many goals for one day, that I can't possibly handle.
 
I usually am not fond of company parties, but you can make them fun. I always do.
 
 
And don't fret if we don't get a white Christmas for pete's sake.
 
I never worry about which list I'm on with the Man in Red, why bother....
 
And I always try to get friends useful gifts that I know they will use.
 
So there you have it.... in a snap!!!!
This is why I'm always in a wonderful, cheery mood, with no worries. And if done correctly, the holiday flies by. And if your lucky you may even remember it. Tootles!!!!

19 comments:

  1. MISTRESS, I'm laughing so hard!!!! Don't ever loose your sense of humor.! This post had me in stitches!!!!

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  2. eat, drink, and be merry! you know how to do all three, mistress!

    PS - THANK YOU for the holiday prezzie! squeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

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  3. And people wonder why the casa gets a bi weekly tanker delivery

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  4. Between the liquor and sex, is it away WONDER your always chipper. I will definitely be trying some of these.

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  5. My side hurt from reading these!!!!!!! And its so much more fun to be on the naughty list isn't it?

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  6. Well this totally makes sense. When I think of the big drinkers..Tallulah Bankhead, Liz Taylor, Patsy Stone, Karen Walker, and the Mistress Borghese!

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  7. BWHAHAHAHA!!!!! I love this list!

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  8. I'm always ready to grope, let me know when the mistletoe is on........ You are too much!

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  9. LOAO!!!!!!!! We will happily bring the gin and the mistletoe!!!

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  10. Love it, walking to a warm bar is my favourite winter sport too!

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  11. Well, you were always very popular with the boys at the store party. These are great.

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  12. Ha ha ha ha, love it! I needed a good laugh this morning. Love the white Christmas one!

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  13. Love these!!!!! And I have the feeling you polish off more than just spirits

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  14. Is it any wonder your so popular at these parties?

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    Replies
    1. I'll also be more than happy to grope you, and het under the mistletoe or at least level with it!!!!!!

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  15. You do know I love my back massager you got me. It works such wonders!

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  16. These are all so funny, but I love the rum balls one the best. That would be me.

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Go ahead darling, tell me something fabulous!

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