Mistress's Flu Regimen

My poor dear friend and sister Mame, as you may know, is under the weather with the flu right now. Poor thing. I hope your feeling better today tootes! Anywho, last week Mark from over at Tales of the Sissy sent me a hilarious email about how not to get the flu. I just laughed my ass off and just had to share. And I'm here to tell you it's no joke. It is why this gin drinker is never sick. Some of you need no reminder, but...

Flu Shot Reminder

(Read to the end.... Then it makes sense!!!)

Eat right!

Make sure you get your daily dose of Fruits and Veggies...

Take your Vitamins and Bump-Up your Vitamin C.

Get plenty of Exercise because exercise helps build your immune system.

Walk for at least an hour a day OR go for a swim, take the stairs, etc...

Wash your hands often. If you can't wash them, keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.

Get lots of Fresh Air... Open doors & windows whenever possible.

Try to eliminate as much Stress from your life as you can.

Get plenty of Rest...

~OR~

Take the Doctor's Approach! Think about it...

When you go for a shot, what do they do first?

They clean your arm with Alcohol... Why?

Because Alcohol KILLS GERMS!! So.......

I walk briskly to the Liquor Store! (exercise)

I put Lime in my Corona! (fruit)

Celery in my Bloody Mary... (veggies)

Drink Outdoors at a Patio Bar... (fresh air)

Tell Jokes and Laugh, which will... (eliminate stress)

Then Pass Out! (rest)

The Way I See It...

If you Keep your Alcohol Levels UP, flu germs can't get you!

My Aunt Always Said...

"A Shot in the Glass is Better than one in the Ass!"

The Mistress swears by this every winter. Oh hell, who am I kidding. I live by this year round. But the Mistress hasn't called out sick in three years! Those germs don't have a chance in this body. Tootles! Thanks Mark for the good laugh.