LESSONS I'VE LEARNED FROM LIFE

At dinner the other night, and after a couple drinks, the clan and I started a conversation about what lessons we have gotten out of life, right after of course a lot of sex talk.Well, like the line from the movie, Auntie Mame, I firmly believe in the line and my life's motto- "Live! Live! Life's a banquet, and some poor sucker are  starving to death." Later that night I compiled a list thus far of lessons I've learned from life and this is what a came to.

 

A day of something wonderful is better than a lifetime of nothing special.

Burn the candles, have champagne, use the nice fancy sheets, wear those hot revealing briefs. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special. For you never know when life may end.

 

Don't wait to old age to be eccentric...be eccentric now.

 

If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it. What would be the point.

 

Personal tragedy should not interfere with the ability to do good hair. Or wash your face. Or getting all dressed up before leaving the house. Understanding half the battle to regain your footing is looking the part.

 

Perfection is a myth. And also boring.

 

There is no such thing as too much

This applies to hair, jewelry, cock, laughter, heel height, pulled pork, gin, emotion, faith, sex, persistence and revelation. Contrary to the old adage, less is actually less. and more is divine!!!!

 

When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile

 

Busy is better than therapy. Know when a calamity comes knocking, don't sit on your fanny and do nothing. Productivity beats wallowing every time.

 

Get outside every day. Tour your area. Miracles are waiting everywhere. No need to go far for a vacation. I am amazed with things I see in my own backyard and just the local area. I am always seeing or finding something new I never saw before.

 

Life is a joking matter. A lesson I adored Rodney Dangerfield for.

 The more serious the situation, the more critical it is that we laugh. Humor is as lifesaving as any flotation device in the rough sea of life. So next time you hold in a whiff of wind, let if fly, you may just make someone's day with laughter.

 

Give in to temptation. Like Mae West, I usually avoid temptation, unless I can't resist it. Which is probably why I became sexual at 12 or 13. Otherwise Id been saying....

I probably never would have made a good Agnes Gooch

 

Stand your ground. I slid out of the womb with confetti, and glitter in my veins. Everybody is normal. I have always been gay from day one. To me gay is the normal and I never felt different. So everyone is normal, so stand your ground.